storm over, calm for now

I love my parents.

I don't say this to them on the phone but I'm pretty sure they know it deep down. They've been through a lot these past years. Mother had CA and went through surgery, chemo and radiotherapy. She lost her her hair but her feistiness remained. Naturally, one loses hair and become deeply laden with insecurity and doubts but obviously... not my mother. She fought her way through CA and look at her now.

Father had three strokes last year. It was one of the painful episodes of our melodramatic life as a family. He is now wheelchair bound and with his other co-mobidities, he still fights back with his own version of life's tenacity. I must say, we have our role models right there. We battle on, through wounds and pains.

It will be their wedding anniversary soon and my mother's birthday. There are a lot of unfulfilled dreams my parents want to achieve. I can make a novel out of it but no matter how many squabbles we create from that, we know love remains the strongest element that could assuage and heal rifts. For their big day and mother's 65th, I think it is time I give them something tangible other than love.

The reality of life is that we will have highs and lows. For now, we have the calm and we will gather strength for the next storm. We are strong contrary to how people perceive us.

fashion change

My interest in fashion has changed drastically over the years.

Now, I'd rather wear tracksuit bottoms or the extreme like wearing three-piece suit and nothing in-between. A branded casual wear is out of my fashion repertoire. I prefer comfort over style and class (looks-wise) over cash (expensive tees and jeans).

I claim this to be a hint of maturity and acceptance of ??ageing process.

re-learning history together

Kaye just visited London from US of A as part of her many Euro Trips in the coming days. I'm glad for not being alone in being grateful to life's lessons. Learning is not wholly confined to reading books but living it through all our senses.

Have a safe trip Missy and may you stumble upon Benedict Cumberbatch  in one of your travels.

a selfie to end all of my selfies

I was bored the other day. The sun was shining and it was generally your not-so-typical day (in UK standards). It would have been a fantastic day out for the pooch but we I decided to sit back and relax (as if I don't do much of it in its regularity). With so many gadgets to tinker, there's only one thing to do and that's the trip down memory lane through photos.

Gelo's right for saying that I'm the king of unabashed self promotion. No one would rival my desire to do a selfie. They should really refer this disorder to me but I realised there are more deserving maniacs out there than me. I have matured.

Going through my pictures that spanned nearly a decade, I was taken aback by this selfie (above photo). It's bare and real. Gloating aside, I see glaring imperfections that fit nicely to compliment the contour of the face. It's a darn good picture.

As they say, do love yourself; your own.

80% for flight of ideas at midnight

It's rather stoooooopid that I blog through my phone when I have the laptop for an easier access and better well-being generally. However, I like the idea of being more "mobile" and less dependent (ironic) to things stationary and less portable.

I thought of posting a "work selfie" today and as you can see, it's a dress down Friday. I look happy in that picture because faking happiness usually transcends stooooopidity of perception from those who can see beyond the arc of the lips and translucence of cornea. I digress. In that picture, I am simply beaming.

Last night before shutting off from the world, I decided to give in to that niggling tick from my brain. It was urging me to type something acadaemic. So I did. 20 minutes later, I managed to draft a 7 page document about OSCE and SIMULATION. A learning programme PROPOSAL was born.

Today, I presented this to my Boss's Boss and she went ecstatic about it. She then said that I present this to the Deputy Director of Operations and Nursing which I did. "Ryan, I like 80% of this proposal", she said. "What's with the other 20%?", I politely asked. "I'd like managers to take ownership of this last part", she quipped instinctively. I looked at her and understood the point.

I am busy enough to take on another role. I'm glad someone powerful reads that pertinent point. I'm well chuffed.

it's better than I thought

SAMSUNG S5 is taking over my artistic life.

WFH nth time

It's that time yet again to review evaluations and recommendations that impact lesson planning and teaching programme delivery. I have tonnes of paperworks to review and on top of that, I have been drawn into this new set of CQUIN (Commissioning for Quality and Innovation) target focusing on SEPSIS Indicators and the Trust Operations Pre-Registration programmes. In an ideal working world, I should be up to my neck or the tip of my remaining head hair in terms of workload. But balance is paramount... otherwise, I'd be pulling my eyelashes out of stress.

That's why, doing some work at home could be beneficial. We know that we have distractions coming from all directions but the atmosphere is less threatening and less hectic allowing a fresher approach to the job being worked on. And oh, did I say it's comfortable as well? Typing PROGRAMME DEVELOPMENT in pyjama is bliss.

the funny thing about carboot

There was a point when I got hooked in roving the countryside every Sunday hunting for unusual items for the prize that's almost free. I must admit that I purchased a few things from carboot and still use them at this point. My stiff-upper-lip-it's-Gucci-Prada-Chanel-or-nothing would frown at the idea of rummaging through used items for the fear of catching something from it. I don't blame them. It's all about preferences and taste. I used to be THAT but I ventured out of the box and saw a wider perspective.

Back to that funny thing....

You start looking over the display and you get an insight of how people live. The product they sell is exactly the reflection of the people they are. Now, that sounds judgmental but you do get a more-than-a-glimpse of their character and choices. It's strange and funny at the same time.

I wonder what my clothes and "stuff" would say about me if I "carboot" them.

Buddha indeed, if dieting fails

It is difficult to control the urge. Eating is a VERY basic need and middle age is the template for everything uncontrollable, difficult and hard. Since working as a full time LEARNING, EDUCATION & DEVELOPMENT CONSULTANT for the Trust, I get to do less physical exertion.  Excess calorie burning takes a millennia and whilst waiting for things to happen, it hibernates around my waist and cheeks (face and buttocks). I stand in the mirror these days and see myself refracted to full angles. I am now a far cry from the physical specimen of college days when I got bullied into unrobing myself in front of the class during physical assessment demonstrations.

I said this before and I will say it again. We stopped going to the gym as we thought having Barney would be a major lifestyle changer. The latter is true but walking Barney isn't really considered a calorie-busting exercise, is it?

Then, you have this fine restaurant a crushed-paper-throw-away from where I work - Baby Buddha, where food is so addictive you want to sue them for inciting gluttony.  They also have fit waiting staff making you believe that what you eat is healthy and for that, you'd want to charge them with psychological warfare.

The truth is, based on the history of my existence, I must be undergoing stress. I have to work this out soon before it gets spelled under my skin with layers of adipose deposits enough to protect me from a serious car collision.

at last!

Amazing!!!!!!

I can blog and post a pic with my phone.

look away now, you squeamish lot

I feel for my dear friend.

I had my appendix removed years ago but this is obviously a different level.

This is a tired cliche but HEALTH IS WEALTH.

There's nothing much we can do with an inflamed appendix.

But in its general sense, it echoes nothing but the truth.

my first Jil Sander

I have been eyeing this pair for months. I just couldn't afford it. Of course I can afford it but not practical enough to justify the need for another sunglasses. Today however, I spotted the same pair and to my surprise, it's down by more than 60%.

You don't say no to a ridiculously discounted JIL SANDER, do you?

Bargain is becoming my middle name.

 

a step ahead

It's true that in this day and age, one has to be exceptional to be noticed ... to be recognised ... to be highly regarded ... to be venerated ... and to be idolised. A second best doesn't exist anymore. Even a first place finish in any talent search doesn't guarantee success and longevity.

A jack-of-all-trade will never be a step ahead.

growing and growing and growing and growing ...

It is official.

I am Samsungified.

There's so much to do with it yet there's so little time.

what people already know and more

I was shopping today when I met a few Filipinos in the chinese supermarket. One of them happened to be one of the sponsors of the Norwich tour and we chatted about the outcome. I said, "There were less people here compared to London and Kent gigs". Then another joined in and said, "That's understandable. There are more Filipino people born in the 70's in Kent and London compared to Norwich. I know a lot here born in the 80's and 90's."

I remained tight-lipped but felt the urge to say something less controversial and argumentative. I said, "The music was fun and everybody enjoyed the show".

Let me rip a bit.

Even if you're born in the 80's and 90's or even a decade ago, their music is ethereal and eternal. You hear their songs reverberating the halls of many venues, locally and internationally, just as much as the decades that passed. Their songs are being sung by top artists and revived because of the melody this new age music lacks. And, I can go on and on rationalising this but perhaps a perfidious person would fail to comprehend what I say so I better shut up.

I am glad I witnessed the event in many perspectives. I hate using the word "awesome" but to relate this to the rest of the populace, the experience was really f____g awesome!

I predict great things for this lady

Meet Alex.

With more confidence, she'll go the longest distance.

Barney is spoiled

... and he pays that loving attention ten folds.

the other perspective

Teaching has its perks.

But no matter how much we psyche ourselves about that thing that pays the bills, it's a still a job that we have to do whether we like it or not (unless you play the lotto and win it). I sometimes think of going back to clinical work ... or put up a business ... or study something new to test my limit. I gloat about the idea of loving the job I do but there are days when motivation plays devil's advocate tipping the balance inconveniently. The struggle is greater than the normal day at the office but it's one way of improving one's professional instinct.

Teaching has its perks. It also helps you grow through uncomfortable ways.

lantern

We were given three mini lanterns (candle holder) for free and a hoarder that we are, we accepted with so much glee. Now, our evenings are not going to be boring with our usual crystal votives lighting the corners of our very massive mansion (of course I'm a fan of hyperbole and embellishments). Hanging behind and against the tulle fabric curtain, it's simply magical.

I don't care what other people think about this but this makes me smile. It's all that matters.

a reluctant switch but ...

Few months ago, I gave in to the lure of Samsung S4. I just came back from the Philippines and stepped onto UK soil minus my iPhone. It was hijacked by a family member. On impulse and need for a phone, I upgraded to a Samsung S4 with a hint of trepidation. I sat for hours navigating its multitude of functionalities in awe. As a final test, I tried my might to sync it with my Macbook but failed miserably. From that point on, it was downhill in terms of interest. It finally waned until my fairy godmother called Feby swapped her newly acquired iPhone5 with me (she's a die hard fanatic of Samsung). It was perfect timing.

Months passed and just like the rest of the million iPhone users, I cruised along life's avenue like a drone enslaved by technology. Then Gelo broke his iPhone and as I was due for an upgrade, I decided to get another phone and eventually gave my still perfectly-pristine-well-conditioned-phone to him. On upgrading, I had two dilemmas:

- I go for Samsung 5 but I have to bear the idea of the hassle of syncing
- iPhone 6? is coming our way in the nearest future ....

The right-here-right-now moment made me decide to go for the best phone at that time. Samsung S5 was the perfect choice. I went  home and just like its predecessor, I spent hours sliding, pushing and flicking through the phone. With every hour burned, my interest grew in proportion.

I am liking the phone now. I won't be surprised if I love it someday just like the other long term relationships I had with my old phones. The problem with loving technology is the tendency to be fickle every 6 months when a new and better gadget gets to ensnare one's attention.

Monopoly is better for the few but change is a stronger catalyst. I am glad I switched.



 

paralleling need and want

I have changed over the years from being a "brand whore" to a Primark essentialist. I've had a taste of Gucci, Chanel, Prada, V. Westwood, LV and other brands that one can purchase from Selfridges, Harvey Nichols and Harrods. In the process, living life was difficult and learned the very hard way i.e. saving for the future is still basic about life's foundation.

The other day when we were having a tete-a-tete over P.Valerie's coffee and cakes, I glanced at the new shop (may not be new but I've been oblivious of this brand) few metres from where we sat. Doc Martens has a reputation and that style is far from being a reflection of the person that I am. But the lure of pure, undefiled leather was too strong to resist that I stood up and walked towards the shop. Inside was a vast collection of the classic Doc Martens boots and accessories. Like a moth to a flame, I was instantly drawn to the backpack with a plain tailored seam and cut. It screamed of high quality. I thought, if Prada or LV made this, the price would range from half a grand or more (as you buy the name more than anything else). With the price tag of 125 pounds, it's still pricey but within borderline reason. I went back to my then dead cold coffee and its concoction was even bitter than a few moments ago (bitterness and spiciness are intensified by low temperature - just an observation).

I'd love this as a gift and I hope my other half reads this blog (like... once in a blue moon). I can buy it myself but I'm a better person now. My mantra is "Truly buy but only buy like buy without hesitation when your want is need magnified". I feel this bag is getting there. It'll be mine someday come SALES season.

reasonable selfitis?

I must say ... that no matter how strenuous and difficult working life can be (not that I get it a lot), a good, dependable team is always a catalyst to bouncing back.

hypnosis

Barney: Look into my eyes. Don't blink. Keep looking in my eyes.

Ryan: Yes Barney. I am looking intensely.

Barney: Repeat after me. I AM A DOG. I AM A DOG.

Ryan: I am a dog. I am a dog.

Barney: Go get me a ham sandwich with mayo and pistachio puree.

Ryan: Yes master.

Barney: FETCH!

moment

I swear he's human.

pampering

NAM's Betty finally had a wash. My whitey gets hand pampered (plus waxed/polished) every month. I have been using a variety of car wash joints in the past year but I always end up getting Whitey a deep down clean in Lowestoft (Suffolk - a half an  hour drive from where I live). This is because they give the best hand car wash that on close scrutiny, its cleaning is even microscopic.

These people are from Eastern Europe. They have a "leader" who speaks broken/halting English and makes all the dealings with the customers. On a good sunshine-y day, I swear it feels like Krakow and Bucharest when they all converse. I get that I'm-an-expat-in-UK-but-my-englsih-is-good-so-I-fit-in-but-today-I-feel-alienated kind of perspective.

I don't mind though for their hands are well trained.

snowed under

Gelo finally opted out of the PINAS Organisation.

Last year, it was a full on commitment and eventually took its toll on our few lifestyle directives. His non-involvement this year was met with fierce persuasions and bribing. But he took a stand and we both decided that I run for office as he takes the background this time. With the success of last year's PINAS events, there's more expectation from the set of officers this year (although the majority of officers from last year comprise this new line-up).

This year is going to be hectic. I have UEA postgraduate modules to do, new job projects/programmes to implement, year-long booking for Filipino events, PINAS and of course, Barney duties.

I better lose weight in the process but I doubt it.

flattery gets very very far

Here's Linda Sargent's comment on my hosting.

"I think Bruce's replacement on STRICTLY COME DANCING should be Ryan Mayor. There is no one better for the job."



   

recommendable

LAZINESS gets the better of me these past weeks. However, there's a very good reason why blogging takes the back burner.

 Gelo and I had been scurrying all over UK as we supported the brains behind the famous OPM HITS in the 70's. In fact, these songs still make regular appearance in national and international events as Filipinos dig deep into their heritage. Another personal fact is that the old songs have better melody than the songs we listen to these days. I'm sure you'll argue this mightily but I couldn't care less. I'm old-schooled and I don't believe in fleeting, flitting moment. I value permanence.

I have been to major local and international concerts but this 70's SUPERBAND Concert in London, Norwich and Kent was AMAZING. We really don't give much value to the people behind the famous songs but hearing them sing their own songs made sense. There's more credibility, story and conviction  to its delivery (please google Snaffu Rigor, Jun Malilin, Nitoy Malilin, Rey Magtoto, Nonoy Tan, Monet Gaskell and Mon Espia).

Filipino expats enjoyed the show and I did too. It's a shame there are still those Pinoys who have lived less than a decade in UK and think they're far too detached to Filipino culture; the latter statement I typed with aggravated politeness. I can't be too harsh in this beautiful Sunday morning.